The Warsaw Coaching Course uses the Daygame Model as the basis for teaching approach skills. This article outlines the model and how to apply it to an interaction with a girl.
The daygame model has the following major stages:
- Stop
- Compliment
- Assumption
- Challenge/Tease
- Rapport
- Investment
- Number close
Note that these are just markers or points to aim for; actual conversations with women are far more fluid and will involve some stages coming before/after others, or being skipped entirely.
This is a more in-depth description:
- Make sure you are smiling before you begin moving to stop the girl.
- Stop her with conviction. Use the ‘question mark’ shape to get close and then move quickly around her so you don’t appear in her peripheral vision too early.
- As you get close to being in front of her, make a non-verbal signal that you want her to stop (e.g. by lowering your hands).
- When you get in front, make sure you are at the 12 o’clock position and plant your feet. If she doesn’t stop, let her go. Don’t edge round to get in front. Don’t trap her next to a wall or walk backwards.
- During the stop, stay rooted to the spot, don’t shift from one leg to the other or make movements that suggest you want to exit.
- If she stops, deliver the compliment. Use low key compliments, like ‘nice’, ‘good’ or ‘lovely’. Avoid gushing too much about her beauty. Don’t be sexually explicit.
- If she walks away, let her carry on, don’t follow after her.
- If she is still in front of you, go straight into an assumption about her – don’t delay or wait for any sign of validation after the compliment.
- The assumption can be anything. Simple ones to use are: what she does for a living, what she is doing right now or where she is from. Offering two different options can also spark interest/engagement from her, e.g.
“At first I thought you were a lawyer, but now I’m in front of you, I’m thinking maybe a teacher because of the way you are dressed”
- Rephrase all questions into assumptions.
- Lead the conversation and take responsibility for managing it. Don’t expect her to do this.
- After the initial assumption, challenge or tease her in some way. The tease can be anything, it doesn’t need to be clever or witty.
- Listen out very carefully for what she responds with. This is your topic. You must use this and not ignore it because it signals you are listening properly and are interested in her.
- If you don’t get a topic, make another assumption and listen for the response to that.
- When she gives you something, make up a story about what she has told you. Again, it doesn’t need to be clever or witty.
- At this stage, there should be more investment from her and she is starting to contribute to the conversation. The sign to look for is when she asks you a question. This is the hook point.
- Go into rapport mode: this is more like a normal conversation and some questions can be asked by you at this point – but use them sparingly.
- Ask for her name and remember it.
- Ground the interaction by talking a little bit about yourself.
- Insert the occasional spike or tease to break rapport. This creates attraction. You want some pull/push.
- Avoid using words like ‘Wow’, ‘Amazing’ etc. Dial down the energy. Don’t act like you are in awe of her, this isn’t what she wants from you.
- Ideally, she should start to do more of the chasing and now it becomes her who is trying to impress you.
- After about four or five minutes of chat, go for the close. Keep this fairly low key, like it’s no big deal, e.g.
“It’s been great talking with you. Another time, I want to take you out for a drink.”
- If you feel like you’ve run out of things to say and you haven’t talked that long, go for the close anyway. It’s less weird to stop a girl and ask for her number than it is to stop her, have a conversation and then do nothing.
- Immediately get out your phone and act like she is going to give you her contact details.
- Check the information and drop a quick ‘Hi’ message so you know the number is correct and have already initiated the text conversation.
The first parts of the model (stop, compliment, assumption and tease/challenge) are all dependent on you. As the man, you must lead them. The model is essentially about transitioning from you showing interest in her, to her showing interest in you.
Practice Points
- Visualise every aspect of this and mentally rehearse going through the entire model from open to close.
- Record yourself making the opening statements and listen back to them.
- Practice making assumptions about girls while you are out.
- Practice thinking up teases/challenges about them.
- Practice making up stories based on random words or concepts.
- Approach a lot and practice this with real girls.
At an intermediate or advanced level, the approach model becomes less useful and modifying it and/or adjusting the process can yield superior results. While you are still learning, however, it is more efficient to stick to the method outlined.
The model described is the basis of what you will learn in the Warsaw Coaching Course.